Bearing with One Another

1 Peter 3:1-9 3 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,

2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.

3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward — arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel —

4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.

5 For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,

6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror. 7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. 8 Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; 9 not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. NKJV

The Christian life is filled with struggles, because it is a life that is called to walk against the grain of this world's ideologies. Therefore, the church needs to learn to bear with one another's sinful nature that is being sanctified through the grace and mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ. This battle is the hardest in the Christian home. Those who profess Christ are called to live under these certain rules for their prayers and life to be sanctified. Peter, who himself had a wife and children, gives us some application as to what this life in the Christian home should look like. He starts with the Christian wife. First, she is to be submissive. The Greek use of this verb [ὑποτάσσω [hupotasso /hoop·ot·as·so/] means “to arrange [troop divisions] in a military fashion under the command of a leader”. In a non-military use, it was “a voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility, and carrying a burden”. This brings the idea of subjection to a higher authority, but in this Biblical context it is not the military use of this verb, but the latter use of the wife putting herself "voluntarily" under the husband's instructions being subject to them. Second, the wife is to voluntarily subject herself to her "own" husband's instructions. The Greek word for the English two words is [ἴδιος [idios /id·ee·os/], which means "privately" submissive in regards to sexual intimacy. She is not to share the "secret prayers" of her husband with another (v. 7). In doing so, if the husband is sinning in word, he may be won by the wife's chaste conduct accompanied with a submissive fear of God.

This fear of God shows up in the form of how they carry themselves. They are not merely to show their beauty outwardly in the code of dress, but in their spirit of thought and word. When women are able to submit to these commands, it is very pleasing in God's sight, and brings special favor upon the household and the church of God. We see how God favored the wives of the patriarchs who trusted the Lord in this area and were called daughters of God. The evidence of this working in the hearts of those women of old was that it was not a terror to them when they continued to do well and were unafraid.

The responsibility of leading the women, without being a terror to them, was upon the men. The men are who make their wives fruitful in these areas. Therefore, Peter tells the men to be understanding and respect that the women are the weaker vessel. The men are to honor their wives with their labor, teaching, and prayers. But when Christian couples fail to do this their prayers will be hindered from coming to fruition. This should be one of the main priorities of the church because the church's greatest mission is to represent the "Light of the World" in the Person of Jesus Christ. The outside world looking in is to be attracted to these qualities. Therefore, we are to bear with one another in love.

8 Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; 9 not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. NKJV

Peter closes this application by exhorting husbands and wives to be of one mind. One mind is to think the same thoughts and have the same compassion for one another. We are to bless when we are cursed instead of competing for the authority in the home. The men are to be tenderhearted and courteous to their wives and the wives are to be gentle and forgiving. When the Holy Spirit makes this known to the hearts of His chosen people they are then enabled to know their calling. God's people are called to inherit the blessing; so that, their prayers for those they love and desire to come to faith and salvation will not be hindered.

May God bless His Word to the hearts and minds of His church.

Col 3:12-13 12 Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. NKJV